I’ve got to say that I’m quite passionate about this subject. It fascinates me to learn how our minds work and why we take certain actions or make certain choices over others. And when it comes to mastering your mindset, ‘self-limiting beliefs’ is a huge topic.
I want to help as many women as possible feel good about themselves and succeed in life. So read the post thoroughly and be sure to take action if you want to see big results and positive changes in your life.
What are self-limiting beliefs?
Limiting beliefs are stories, in general, we believe to be true. On the other hand, self-limiting beliefs are stories we tell ourselves about ourselves. For example,
“Earning money is difficult” – Limiting belief
“I am not good enough to succeed” – Self-limiting belief
Therefore they limit us from taking certain actions. It’s our beliefs that spark our thoughts and it’s our thoughts that spark our actions. So, how how do you think you’d you act in certain circumstances if you believe negative thoughts about yourself instead of positive ones?
Most common self-limiting beliefs
The list of limiting beliefs can be never-ending, truly! Here are some limiting beliefs examples:
Money: You may not be aware of this one, most people don’t know their own money blocks. It could be holding you back from attracting more money into your life.
An example of this is the belief is “I’m not smart enough to be in a high paid job”
If this is one of your self-limiting beliefs subconsciously, you’ll spend your life never applying yourself to get a better-paid job than the one you’re in.
Relationships: People believe that relationships can be hard work, that love is difficult to find. Or the classic “All men cheat”
This really holds people back from putting themselves out there and meeting new people because of the belief that they’ll get hurt
Success: When it comes to success, most people have limiting beliefs in business.
An example is “I am not good enough to be a leader” or “No one will listen to what I have to say”
This holds people back from taking action to maybe create their own business or even getting a promotion in a current job.
If you’re more interested in what beliefs you need to have to be successful, read my post ‘3 Influential Women Who Can Teach You the Meaning of Success & How to be Successful Yourself’
Self-Love: Beliefs about this often include “I’m ugly” “I’m fat” “No one will love me the way I am”
These beliefs often lead to depression and can bring on more health complications.
Why we have them
Most of our self-limiting beliefs are formed in our childhood. They come from our experiences and observations.
When I was younger I constantly watched my parents work hard to have money coming in and pay the bills. I didn’t have a lot as a child for this reason and I was the eldest of 3 so I was always sharing with my siblings.
My mum worked in a low paid job and my dad was a self-employed builder who struggled to find work. My mum was on benefits and she never seemed to have any money left.
Growing up and watching this, I formed many beliefs about money and business. I ended up believing that being self-employed was a bad decision and that being successful and earning money was not possible for me, being my mum and dad’s child.
However, in recent years I’ve been able to eliminate these self-limiting beliefs. If I hadn’t done so, I’d not be blogging and writing this post right now!
How to identify them
Start out with the most common ones stated above. Write out a list of each belief you have for those topics, Money, success, relationships, and self-love. They don’t all have to be negative, they can be positive beliefs too.
Section them out as ‘positive belief’ and ‘negative belief’
Once you’ve done this, for each topic/belief ask yourself the following questions…
Which belief holds me back from taking certain action?
Which belief allows me to take positive actions in life?
How would my life be different if I didn’t have this belief?
Where did I learn this belief from?
Think about you childhood and what you can remember from it, did you have good or bad experiences? What did your parents teach you?
Don’t worry if you’re not aware of how you formed a certain belief. If the answer is “I don’t know” it will be even easier to eliminate that limiting belief because you have no evidence that it’s true. And that brings me onto the next subject…
Eliminating your self-limiting beliefs
Firstly, it’s super important to understand that they are just thoughts in our heads. They’re not facts so telling yourself this is the first step.
The second step is looking at the evidence. Earlier on you would have identified where you learned your belief from. So, after identifying this, are you 100% sure that this is the truth?
Looking back at my own story, I learned to believe that I would never be successful. It’s not that my parents weren’t supportive, it’s just that my observations of their success made me believe otherwise. When I acknowledged this I asked myself “What evidence do I have that I, personally can’t be successful?” Of course, the answer was a big fat 0!!
It’s also helpful to ask yourself “what evidence do I have that says otherwise?”
So for example, if your self-limiting belief is “I will never be successful”, think about all the times that you have been. Even if they’re small wins. Did you pass your GCSE’s? Have you had a successful interview and been offered the job you wanted?
Finally, the last step is to create new beliefs. Always be kind and positive to yourself.
One really interesting this about your mind is that it can’t distinguish the difference between a thought you’ve made up and something that’s happened in real life. So if you tell yourself positive things about yourself, you’ll soon notice a difference in your actions because you’ll start to believe it.
Write yourself some new beliefs and read them out to yourself every day.
I hope this inspires you to take action and work on your mindset. I will finish by leaving you with this ‘limiting beliefs’ quote…
There is one grand lie – that we are limited. The only limits we have are the limits we believe– Wayne Dyer
Please comment below and let me know your self-limiting beliefs or share this post if you enjoyed reading it!